Thursday, June 20, 2013

Big Time Bottleneck

 June 2013 - Arlington, Texas.  Refrigerator at work.

I haven't blogged since May 2011? Sheesh. I tripped and fell head first, smack dab into the center of American Life. Busy busy busy. Buried.

I’m suffering from an interpersonal bottleneck [bxA] of epic proportion.  Back in September 2010 when the global adventure skidded to a halt in Texas, I was wholly unprepared for the return to real life.  Somewhere between the ashram in the Himalayas and the bungalow in Thailand, I stopped expressing myself verbally.  The blog dwindled, the journal writing waned, and the mile long emails to my friends stopped entirely.  

It turns out this is not a healthy existence for me.  But I can’t seem to dig myself out of it.  Many months ago I stopped replying to emails so people started texting me.  Now I don’t reply to texts.  I almost never listen to voicemails and I rarely return phone calls. 

I talk incessantly at work, about work, but those are my only words.   It hasn’t been good.  I haven’t been happy.  My job is cool and my life is comfortable, but the bottleneck has been tough.

And so I’ve decided to force myself to write.  The blog, the journal and email.  One a day.  Each.  They may be short, they may be bad, but I’m committed to busting the bottleneck.

Oh, and I’m leaving for Lagos, Nigeria on Monday.